We were connected, and we knew that we wanted to be connected more. I was about to follow my body and heart who wanted him. However, my brain told me different things. ‘You are in your pajama’, ‘your hair is so mess’, ‘no make up!’, ‘Your thick glasses!!!’, ‘You will look foolish old woman when you are on top of him’
So I didn’t give me nor him what we wanted. Eventually, we ended up with what we wanted. However, it could have been HOT if I followed my heart.
One thing that hit my head is that my soul always tells me before my brain. It was my choice what to follow. I also realized that I have been programed by follow expectations which also mean out focusing. So what benefits have I gotten?
I had sex which may look Okay IF someone saw me. It was like that I was craving for McDonald, but I wanted look savvy, so I ended up with lamb steak in fancy restaurant. (I don’t eat lamb) After I spent energy to find restaurant, money for gourmet food and time for waiting, I am not hungry, but I am still craving for Big Mac.
What is the point of having sex? It is one of the way that you express you and receiving the other. It is communication. Hot sex doesn’t require certain shape of body nor sexy lingeries. When we feel about full of connection, it will be HOT!!!
I chose to be hot by acknowledging what I want- listen to my soul. I chose to be hot by acknowledging that I judgement is nurtural feedbacks that I should not be charged by.
Connection does not require anything but heart either between me and the others or me and me.